me.

Im the daughter of a mad hatted mother who couldn't read emotions even written on my face with eyeliner.
I have a father that money ate and threw up, i watched him get so mad, keep filling up his cup.
I grew up alone developed a personality, when no one could decipher it i questioned my sanity,
began to hate vanity when it took the people around me for a ride inside the mind of who they were supposed to be.
I learned to take what I make at a young age, I pay for what I break and I grow from my mistakes.
Never let anyone too far in, theres too thin a line between love and a trash bin.
I tie knots on string until my fingers bleed, was a hobby until it turned in to a need to expose the bones under my flesh to let you see more of what I am than what you thought I might be.
and I can guarantee what you thought was wrong, because I changed myself to not fit in your palm.
I'm not a liar, but I've told my fair share of lies. I'm not a follower, but I've seen through others eyes. I'm a leader in disguise of a girl with a sad life, I've been called a goddess but was never baptized. And I dont take shit for that to easily, you want me to feel guilt? your going to have to force feed it to me.

october

She looks like the first leaf
to fall off of a maple tree
mid-october.
she wishes for the man passing by to frame her
hang her on a wall.
but she knows when his shadow falls over her fragile body
that she will just be stepped on again.
breaking in to more and more,
smaller and smaller
less significant
peices.