Waving From the Past

I’ve seen the way you process but I don’t understand

because processing your processes

wasn’t part of my plan

in fact I didn’t have one

you caught be by surprise

when I looked up from my desk and saw the intensity in your eyes

which held our fate, I saw it.

clearer than your intentions

clearer than the dimensions we created from the tension

clearer than the prison walls we stared at every day

clearer than the look you gave when I said I shouldn’t stay

but I did

and look at where I sit now

I gather dust on this green hill but I still sit proud

I still sit with a smirk and constantly look down

I still sit with your words and I spin them around to process more delicately

what  I thought I found

and what I found was a boy still jumping off the playground

still screaming inside but un able to make a sound

so you crawled back into that prison I once sat

and wave to me on my hill and constantly think back

back to the past where we once used to live

where we once used to give kisses on the cheek and slaps on the wrist

scars on the heart and blood on our lips

the taste of fate

it was too much to digest

butterflies and stomach acid made quite a mess.

so we scrubbed

we bleached out all our past crimes

offering our fate a fair chance to unwind

and it did

but not the way that I had seen

so I walked cautiously down a path that lead me

to a valley surrounded by hills

so I climbed up one to see the walls you had built

so I wave

I wave back at you

you’re waving from the past but I can still see you

you’re waving from the past but you still get through